Discussion in 'Spey Clave' started by Charles Sullivan, Jan 1, 2010.
Charles, I think we may have some mutual pals...this thread got me...too funny. My wife and I got our heels kicked out from under us when our 2nd was born 2 months ago. One is a blessing, two is a sentence, right? Lord knows I love em both and if there were a gun to the head forcing the decision....the family vs. steelhead...I'd have to say I'd really miss those little kids.
Enjoy every minute of the anticipated short season we get up north this year!
Yeah, I see a mutual pal.
I promote vascectomies for all. It's a mission.
I love my girls but I'll let everyone know the truth abut children when given a chance. It seems most people high grade their memories. Good luck with yours.
Charles, I am with you. Steelheading comes second to my kids and my wife's sanity. However, between the amount of time I spend working and other outside activities, I take and relish every minute I have on the water. Fall and winter are usually, and I stress usually my slow times at work, so I try and get out as much as feasibly possible. This year I have tried to wrap my head around the theory of not being first on the water and try and enjoy dropping my daughter off at school or being home early enough to give the boy a bath and just what ever time I get fishing.
I can't say it is ideal, but it has gotten better as they get older. I am with you, I don't know if my daughter or even my son will have even a slight interest in steelhead fishing. I don't know how old your kids are, but I grin ear to ear every time I do get out fishing and they meet me at the door, stoked that I am home. First question out of their mouth is "daddy did you catch any fish?" Obviously, they don't fully know winter steelheading.
We do high grade our memories. I sat through more violin recitals than I can imagine, and hauled kids to soccer games on fall weekends that were perfect for dryside steelheading. Yet I did still fish, so I guess what I remember is a balanced life that was multi-dimensional. And altho it doesn't seem like it when the little rug rats are in diapers, they do grow up amazingly fast, and you have time to go fishing that you thought you'd never see again.
You are nothing if not honest. It's about balance. I have struck a good balance in my life overall. Generally, family (parents, grandparents) does not provide a balanced look at parenthood when people make decisions about whether to have children. They tend to skip over the negative aspects of parenthood. I have really appreciated your honesty on the subject, as we've discussed this subject before. It certainly has helped me find a balance.
I'm fishing tomorrow.
People make decisions about having children? kidding. I had always assumed I would have a family - just cuz. Funny thing is, I began to think that not having children could actually be an option, just a couple months before my wife got pregnant. So much for that novel idea. My life has mostly involved bumping from one accident to another until a little over 10 years ago. I'm amazed things have gone so well.
New line should arrive tomorrow, probably while you're fishing.
You guys are pathetic. I spent the first 2/3 of my adult life riding Harleys, chasing high dollar construction jobs, loose women & drugs, not all in that order. Steelheading? Yeah I did that also. Sometime in my forties I met a gal that had a couple of kids by some other loser. In a moment of moral confusion I ask her to marry me. Instant family just add daddy. Got her kids raised and out of the house. Now have grand kids showing up. I have seen this crap from both sides totally unbalanced.
I buy ground coffee for fishing days.
What started as a funny thread has evolved into one of my alltime favorites.
The inherent paradox - prioritizing a cute face and nice ass is great for making babies, but maybe not as good for the extended responsibilities of marriage and baby-raising.
Lucky me - my mom warned me not to get married till I was out of college. By then I was a golfing and fishing bum and safe till my 40s.
Then in a moment of weakness I followed Kerry's "path" (only inherited 1, and she hasn't spawned yet).
My .02 - the more you NEED kids, the more willing you are to forsake your own hobbies to raise them.
Man, I can't believe this....Not the kids and wife thing...that's been happening to me for 22 years...Never look for thanks because you'll never get it...IMHO...
I would think you shouldn't be haunted but thankful...that's a pretty damn good start to the season...and shaking hands and losing one is a helluva lot better then shaking your ding in the bushes...or bush for that matter!!!
I would consider it pretty good karma for being a responsible dad...thank god cause we gots enough hillbilly flucks out here~~~~
Both of my kids were supposedly accidents. I wasn't planning on a family, but you all know how that goes. I took the kids fishing in front packs, back packs, and whatever else that I could figure out how to get out fishing. Both of my kids were good soccer players and played on premier teams. I never minded tournaments or league games over in Eastern WA or out of state as I always packed a couple of rods and found a little time to fish. They both had punch cards when they were 2 so with a little help from dad they were able to reel. Today they both fish. Daughter fly and gear fishes. Son is a hard core downrigger guy who thinks fly fishermen are a bunch of whiny limp wristed gender benders.
Story of my life man... except without the dope (crazy enough without it) and substitute Hondas for Harleys. Call me a wuss, fuck off, that's how it was. Harleys are for men with tiny tiny dicks. My opinion only of course...no disrespect intended Kerry-
I think the thing is, we all come into balance in our own way, every way is unique.
man this is a grown up thread....
ive been married for a 1.5 years. wifes been talking about kids since we met 9 years ago. I dont know how this is going to play out in a couple of years but to be honest i don't want kids. My wife keeps thinking i'm kidding or joking when i disagree when the "having kids/when we have kids" conversation comes up. I'm getting pressure from all sides...friends, my family, her family, co-workers. I dont want to have kids just becuase of fishing, i just dont want the responsibility..esepcially dont want the responsibility of rasing a kid in this fucked up world.
i use to get out of the "kids" conversation by telling her i would have kids around the age of 27, i've been saying this since we met. I'll be 27 in April and i can tell you it aint happening by then. I'm still young and i want to stay young and keep doing the things im doing, even if i have to do it alone. I think she knows this, as my adventure side is want has always attracted her to me the most, and if it was taken away or restricted then i wouldnt be the same.
i need a beer and a chew
I've been married all my life, or at least it feels like it. 4 grown kids, 9 grand children, 1 great grand child, so its a profilic bunch too...
A guy once told me kids are like arrow, you aim them at the target and let the bowstring go, whether they hit the bullseye depends on the quality of the bow, the correctness of the aim, gravity and the wind.. most of it out of your control after release. That has been true with me, I made a lot of mistakes and my kids turned out OK in spite of it.
Now I have an 11 year old grand daughter who is a fly fishing fanatic, asks to go every day. We're heading out SRC fishing a little later today in fact. She got new wading boots for Christmas and can't wait to try them out. She has it all, waders, bots, vest, hat, rod, reel with extra spools and all the right lines, can out cast her dad already, I love it.
So, yeap kids change your life and crimp your style, but I can't imagine life without the joy that I get from my grandkids, except maybe the 3 yr old boy, who is a handful, but already wants to go fly fishing.