I wish my wife liked to fly fish!

Hey Prettyfly,
Sounds good going fishing with your boyfriend, sounds like a nice guy, but maybe his time fishing with his buddy on the Island is an important thing for him and his buddie , maybe they dont dont get together to often, there only fishing , and i would imagine having a beer or three.
I think its really good that your into going fishing with him, not sure what his buddie would say about you going, maybe better let them have there little trip, i,m sure he would make it up to you when he got back.:ray1:


Not to be confused with freestoneangler
Ladies, maybe we should start a new post: How do I get my boyfriend/husband to fly fish?! Actually, I think everyone's suggestions are great and apply to anyone trying to get someone exposed to a new activity, no matter what genders are involved. And no matter how hard we try to get them to enjoy it, we must all accept they might not come to share our passion.

My solution is to only date guys who avidly fly fish because even with guys who only occasionally fly fish, well... it just doesn't work out. You guys think you have it bad...let me tell you, it's worse for a woman. Try to explain to a guy that doesn't fish much: (actual situations)

- yes, I really am getting up at 4am even though it's snowing and I'll be home when, well, when I get home...but, I may just crash in the car and fish tomorrow too...
- yes, I know I already have 3 pairs of waders... but, but these boots have Aquastealth soles, all my others are felt...
- yes, I'm going alone and yes, I know it's probably not safe and yes, I'll be careful... (thinking "I really should find a new boyfriend, one who will come along")
- yes, I am fishing next weekend too 'cause the pinks/chum/fill-in-the-blank will be in...no, I can't catch them next month...
- yes, I'm going even though it's my birthday/Thanksgiving/etc... I'll only be gone 3 days...
- honey, you just don't get it, the action of that new 5 wt is different than the other 5 wts I already have...
- here, see if my gloves will fit you (thinking...please stop whining, I don't want to quit early 'cause I didn't get to fish last weekend...)
- but honey, it doesn't get dark 'til 10 and that when the Hex hatch really gets going...
-yes, I know it's freezing out...you just don't get it, it's Steelheading...I don't care if I have a kidney infection, it's Steelhead! Don't worry...I'm picking up a prescription on the way...
- yes, I know the guides have been icing up all day and it's almost dark...but…I'll be there shortly if you want to go wait in the rig (he did)...I just want to see if they'll hit this streamer (I tied last night)...
- well, you could put some bug spray on... the hatch is just starting...
- uhm, well yeah, I'm throwing a rod in...you never know...
- I know the doctor said I shouldn’t cast yet…I promise I’ll only cast left-handed…(geez, it really hurts, maybe the doctor is right…)
- do you know how many rods I could buy for that much money?!

So guys, put yourselves in ours shoes - it's even worse for most women to use the same explanations on their boyfriends/husbands. Not sure why.... any ideas?
I think all you gals that have posted here and the ones us guys have at home with the same itch. Need to get together and fish sometime as a girls day, night or weekend or what ever out somewhere without us guys in tow. Heck I would love a chance to fish without Amie sometime but rarely get the chance. If she went with you all some place I could make sure to go some where else and fish just by myself like I used to. though its all good.:) Besides she is still a little upset that she did not get to go on the Yak get together and if she got a trip on her own maybe I would finally have heard the end of it.
Been married 36 years. Wife will go to lake or stream and read a good book but really isn't interested in fly fishing. She enjoys camping and hiking but lacks the patience for fly fishing, fishing period. She has floated the Yakima with me on several occassions but never fished. Just not her thing, but she is a good trooper and occassionally tags along. However, sometimes it nice to get with your buddies and do your thing.


Charles Sullivan

ignoring Rob Allen and Generic
Certain conditions must apply
good weather (70 degrees plus)
lots of fish
dry fly's
Pretty place
It used to happenonce every 2 years or so. Now we have a child so it may never again happen.


Not to be confused with freestoneangler

I also like a balance of fishing alone and with others. I'd be happy to fish with Amie anytime - can't have too many fishing buddies! If you guys want to meet up on the Yak, I'll row her in my double Outcast and you can go wade fish and catch-up with us later. Just don't get too upset if we have more fun and hook more fish!

You might also point her to the Northwest Women's Flyfishing club. I've met many great women fishing buddies there and some wonderful friends. Many of the outings are open to husbands/partners/kids, etc. so she could team up with one of the ladies for the day while you did your own thing or even joined one of the other guys. In the evenings, NWF is rumored to have the best pot-lucks of any club out there! PM me if she wants club details or wants to hook up sometime to fish...I'm out somewhere most every weekend, winter and summer.


Jerry Daschofsky

Staff member
Sue, my girlfriend had looked into that. She wants to try flyfishing more, just too involved with her horses. LOL. So she goes occasionally with me (when time allows her to LOL). I know she wants to do it more, just she still freaks about casting (more having a hook fly by her lol). With a test fly, she's awesome (a true natural). I just can't get her past her fear of hooking herself. LOL.

I don't mind women fishing at all. I know my girlfriend went on a "girls only" fishing trip for steelhead a year or so ago (was gear fishing though). She had fun. Most of her friends are big time horse lovers, who have no want (or desire) to fish. Most are pretty "girly" for being rough and tough rodeo women (most won't camp nor even attempt to pee outside lol). May have to get my girlfriend to sign up an account here. Just she's the type that won't jump in on things. So not sure I could get her to post. Now, if this was a "horse/fishing" site, she'd be posting away. LOL
Hi all,

I haven't posted here before, but I've done a lot of lurking. I can't really add to the advice, but I can say it is pretty rewarding watching your wife/gf catch a fish, especially their first. My wife isn't hardcore about fishing, but she likes being out on the water. She normally just really likes catching panfish. Probably for the reasons that people have pointed out, nice weather and usually lots of action. This summer however, we took a family trip to Canada where I wanted to do some flyfishing. She decided now was the time to try. They were hitting caddis patterns in the evening, but just barely sucking them down. She probably missed the first 30 takes. She was getting a little frustrated, but I think she wasn't about to let these fish get away. The trick finally came when she hung up her line in an overhanging branch. The fly was dangling about ten inches above the water. Apparently this was too tantalizing for an 8-inch rainbow that promptly leaped out of the water and hooked itself on the fly. It was a pretty big lake, but the rest of our family back at the campground said they knew she had caught something when they heard her screaming. She did start hooking some on her own after that. But anyway, she seems to be pretty excited about it now. We just ordered a boat at the boatshow that will let us do a little better job flyfishing out of a boat.



lurker at large
speyghillie said:
I think its really good that your into going fishing with him, not sure what his buddie would say about you going, maybe better let them have there little trip, i,m sure he would make it up to you when he got back.:ray1:
Hmm.... well.. he better start thinking about how he's going to make it up to me then..lol just doesn't seem fair that he's away so long and then takes off on a 2 week fishing trip without me.. bawling:

I'll make a trip to the jewlery store (read diamond) and see what I like.... LOL



Not to be confused with freestoneangler
Jerry, maybe you could get Chris to add a horse packing/fishing forum to the site, lol! Horse packing to some alpine lakes to camp and fish might get her more interested. I know what you mean about time and horses – my QH and TB are leased out as I don’t really have time for them, but don’t tell her that or she may never fly fish, lol. Seriously though, fishing with some other women may be good if she really wants to try to get more into fly fishing. I’ve been fishing since I was 5 (self-taught as I didn’t know anyone who fished) but until I joined the NWF, I had never fished with another woman; I just never met girls/women who fished so I fished with mostly solo as a kid then later with boyfriends, (ex) husband, then solo, boyfriends, solo…etc., lol! (see previous post for possible explanation, lol!)

Trust me, at least for me, it’s a whole different experience fishing with just other women and that male/female dynamic is removed; I often find this to be true with most sports and doubly so when it’s a romantic partnership and one person is experienced and one isn’t. Don’t get me wrong, I have a blast fishing with my male buddies and romantic partners too and wouldn’t trade it for the world – it’s just different fishing with guys vs women, as different as fishing solo vs a in group.

This is a generalization, but I find that whether I’m fly fishing or teaching kayaking, snowshoeing, winter camping, etc in an all female environment, many women loosen-up more, focus on themselves and their learning rather than on their male partner and/or kids. I find their learning curve and confidence is really enhanced and they can then re-join their families and really get into it and be more self-sufficient. Anyway, I’d encourage your girlfriend to try hooking up with some other women and see if she gets over that fear of hooking herself! Maybe she can join Hikepat’s Aimee and me and we can make it a threesome (guys, get your minds out of the gutter,lol!) I might need to borrow a bigger boat though. Do you have a 3 woman cat boat?!


Jerry Daschofsky

Staff member
Actually Sue, I'm not like most guys when it comes to teaching. I am very patient, and just let them lead the way with what they want to learn. My girlfriend is a life long horsewoman (actually is an Equine Sports Massage Therapist). Her horses are her "babies", so NO chance of ever leasing them out (she knows all about that, she just won't do it). Onto teaching though, I don't push her and let her go at her own speed. But one of the reasons I kind of put the bug in her ear about the womens organization. I know that sometimes the learning curve changes when she can relax (though, I give her special rewards for doing a good job on the river :D ).

I wouldn't ask Chris to do that. If anything, I'd start up a small board for that myself. LOL. Interest levels wouldn't be enough (plus, she's on some specialized horseboards now, probably start doing cutting and team penning here soon once her knee heals up from her ACL surgery). She has an appy and a QH and those are her life.

Hell, would be great to get a girls weekend fishing. Hell, I would even think about hosting one down at my Dad's place on the Wynoochee. Plenty of room for tents and a few trailers. Would have to square out some dates though to do it. Maybe make it a significant other weekend, and let the girls go off and play (I'd just sit back in my recliners and have a cold one lol).


Not to be confused with freestoneangler
Great idea, Jerry! A WFF Women’s weekend…I like it and I’ll be there if we can figure out a date and place! Maybe we should start a new thread… I’m open to either an all gals’ weekend or one with significant others…heck, maybe while the girls fish, the boys can stay at camp cooking up a storm and have a hot meal and some wine waiting for us, LOL! Just kidding! I think it would be a great way to connect with other women on the site (I know you’re out there) and, keeping the original question of this thread in mind, be a great way for a guy to help his wife/partner/girlfriend get more excited about fly fishing. So…anybody interested? Kristen, are you game?

Jerry Daschofsky

Staff member
My place on the Wynoochee would work for it (depending on how many show). Have access to the neighbors lot (lifelong friends of my Dad's). Plus, I'm a hell of a cook (and have the stuff to cook for the masses). So would work. Could be a go. Have access to some good rivers too (Nooch, Satsop, Chehalis if you want, Humptulips, etc). If it's down at my Dad's place, would have to get the ok from him first (long story, normally not a problem, but health reasons I'm trying not to take up his private time down there if he has it planned).

But it's a quiet place. Especially during the winter, not many people down there. Now summer, forget it. LOL


Not to be confused with freestoneangler
Sounds great Jerry! Especially the cooking part, lol. I've never had a guy stay in camp and cook; I was only kidding, but that would be pretty incredible! Let us know when it might work for your dad then maybe we can start a new thread and see who is up for it. In the mean time, the offer is still open to hook up with Amie, your girlfriend, etc... for a day outing.

Jerry Daschofsky

Staff member
Ok, will let her know when she comes back from Georgia (she's there visiting her Mom). Actually, I'm a pretty good cook, and have done "camp cook" duties at quite a few hunting/fishing camps and also at a couple fishing events (with about 100 fisherman, mostly running a deep fryer though). I wouldn't mind. Will add though, I usually was hunting and fishing with the rest as well. They just had to wait on dinner (since I stayed out until I was finished lol). Will talk with my Dad though. I do make a mean SOS for breakfast. LOL.