NFR: The Cat got Bagged

#1
Yeah, so, after sitting on my back deck with my airsoft pistol next to me, and the all-metal electric full auto MP5 ready in case I needed it... swilling beers... just sittin' here nice and content...

I heard my younger cat growl and looked at where she was looking. Not twenty feet from me, really well camouflaged in the tree branches overhanging the fence, was the little fucker that pissed on my waders. At first I couldn't see him, then I picked up on his eyes looking at me. Pointed the sight a little to the right and fired two in succession into the offenders ass end.

He was off that fence instantly and hasn't been back. And if he does come back, I'll have a non-lethal arsenal ready to let his stupid feline ass know this is MY yard and MY garage and any little furry fucker that thinks it isn't is gonna have some welts on their asses.

I got my cats for my son. And now he's gone. I like them sometimes... sometimes.. they are really disgusting little animals. What I'd give for a dog.

This post, was merely a product of me realizing I'm still sitting out here on my deck in the dark, satisfied, and realizing I must be bored since I was the last commenter for the last six posts in a row.

Ok. Going to bed! Soon... I promise... heheh.
 
#6
Escalate. You need more powerful tools.
Lol. Just moved into this house in April. Nice neighborhood. Have my surrounding neighbors on first name basis. If they figure out I'm waging war on cats it could be bad.

I need to use stealth, discretion. But I agree the little F will be back. I think half a dozen in the rump from a full auto burst might dissuade it more.

I did notice it took my neighbor much longer to call the cat in than usual. At the very least I created some stress and mistrust with humans, perhaps.
 

_WW_

Geriatric Skagit Swinger
#10
Paint balls. Cats hate getting shot with paint balls. The stuff tastes like shit and it embarrasses them to no end. Paint the little bastard a few times, he won't come back.
Works for dogs too...and more importantly...their owners know they are out getting into trouble!
 

David Loy

Senior Moment
#12
Heheheh. That's a good movie Jim. Laughed all way to work this morning. Paint balls would probably be better. Cats are all about dignity. Hard to be nonchalant and arrogant when your mad as hell and your ass is pink. Even better if the cat has a dog mate laughing at him. You'll win this thing.
 
E

Evan Virnoche

Guest
#13
1. get a ghillie suit, 2. hide in bushes in a prone or tactical positition 3. filet knife or machete 4. locate target 5. seal tim six its ass. 6. Have a cold one and celebrate your victory
 

Tim Cottage

Formerly tbc1415
#14
From your initial post on the cat situation "Pretty sure I know which neighbor cat did it. Not about to do anything in retribution to the cat, though, that's not right."

So at what point did this change?

TC
 
#15
From your initial post on the cat situation "Pretty sure I know which neighbor cat did it. Not about to do anything in retribution to the cat, though, that's not right."

So at what point did this change?

TC
Retribution would involve serious bodily harm or relocation to the 509 area code or worse.

This has a clear goal of territorial lines being established.