NFR Quarantine Humor

silvercreek

WFF Supporter
Miscellaneous Awards for Stupidity from World News:

The chef at a hotel in Switzerland lost a finger in a meat cutting machine and submitted a claim to his insurance company. The company expecting negligence sent out one of its men to have a look for himself. He tried the machine and he also lost a finger.

The chef's claim was approved.
 

herkileez

WFF Supporter
Miscellaneous Awards for Stupidity from World News:

The chef at a hotel in Switzerland lost a finger in a meat cutting machine and submitted a claim to his insurance company. The company expecting negligence sent out one of its men to have a look for himself. He tried the machine and he also lost a finger.

The chef's claim was approved.
I wonder if the insurance company man had insurance.
 

cdnred

Active Member
I'm not sure of the provenance of this clip, but I believe that's a ripsaw catfish. They're found in select South American rivers, and they look hardy enough to thrive in Butte's tailing ponds.
Hence they've become another invasive species..?
 

silvercreek

WFF Supporter
A Scotsman, American, and an Irishman are in a bar.

They are having a good time and all agree that the bar is a nice place.

Then the Scotsman says, "Aye, this is a nice bar, but where I come from, back in Glasgow, there's a better one. At MacDougal's, you buy a drink, you buy another drink, and MacDougal himself will buy your third drink!"

The others agree that sounds like a good place.

Then the American says, "Yeah,that's a nice bar, but where I come from, there's a better one. Over in Brooklyn, there's this place, Vinny's. At Vinny's, you buy a drink, Vinny buys you a drink. You buy another drink, Vinny buys you another drink."

Everyone agrees that sounds like a great bar.

Then the Irishman says, "You think that's great? Where I come from in Dublin, there's this place called Murphy's. At Murphy's, they buy you your first drink, they buy you your second drink, they buy you your third drink, and then, they take you in the back and get you laid!"

"Wow!" say the other two. "That's fantastic! Did that actually happen to you?"

"No," replies the Irish guy, "but it happened to me sister!"
 

silvercreek

WFF Supporter
A 47 year-old lady gets a facelift. It turns out very well and she enjoys showing off her new look.

She goes to the newsstand and asks the man,

''Sir, how old do you think I am''?

The man replies ''You're 30, right?''

She says ''No, I'm 47, but nice try.''

The next day, she goes to McDonald's. She orders her lunch and asks the young man at the counter, ''How old do you think I am?''

The man replies, ''You're 37, right?''

The lady says ''No, I'm 47, but good guess.''

After lunch, she gets on the bus and she asks an 85-year-old man how old she is. He replies ''Lady, I can tell how old any woman is by sticking my hand down her panties.''

So, quietly and quickly, she lets him do so.

He thinks a moment and announces, ''You're 47!''

The lady, astonished, asks, ''How did you know?''

The old man replies ''I was standing right behind you at McDonald's"
 

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