If the virus doesn't get me the cabin fever will.
America needs to get back to the good old days where we a knowledged the scientific fact that good jokes about inappropriate subjects are funny as hell even though they maybe shouldn't be.
When Osama bin Laden died, he was met at the Pearly Gates by George Washington, who slapped him across the face and yelled, "How dare you try to destroy the nation I helped conceive!"As we end week two of this lockdown, I’ve been thinking about Osama Bin Laden. He was stuck in his house with three wives for five years. I’m beginning to wonder if he called in those Navy Seals himself.
Does everyone else read these Sven & Ole jokes with an accent?Sven, Ole and Toivo are out fishing for walleyes on opening weekend in the U.P. It's about 25 degrees out, there's freezing rain coming down and the walleyes aren't biting.
Finally, Sven says "I'm gonna try for a musky. He ties on a big plug, stands up on the boat seat and casts as far as he can. Sure enough, a musky hits. When Sven sets the hook he slips on the icy boat seat and falls overboard and doesn't come up.
After a minute, Ole says, well, I guess I better try to save him." Ole pulls off his coat, dives in to the cold dark water, and gropes around until he's out of breath. He comes up for air and dives back down. After doing this about five times, he finally feels some clothing, swims to the surface and pulls the lifeless body into the boat.
Toivo says "I guess I better try to resuscitate him and starts mouth to mouth. After a second his stops and says "Cripes, I never realized Sven had such foul breath." Ole replies, "Yeah, and you know, I don't remember him wearing a snowmobile suit."