and then there’s you…The Grumpy old dude
Can't forget this one.
Droning on about how everyone is flawed in some manner or another...but has to ask for help naming the flaws of others 'cuz he forgot some of them.
Forgot how to fish.
A few more...just off the top of my head here.
Works minimum wage retail jobs, but knows more about Constitutional law than the people who wrote it...
Just ask him. Finds all fishing locations lacking in some respect, so rarely fishes.
Post count and likes are the thing here.
No substantive content, just 'hey look at my toys'. Desperately Seeking Attention.
Owns a camera and a few lenses, has an Instagram account. Fishes only for likes.
The Long Form Poster
Every damn post is ' War and Peace '.
Trolling with poor bait, no roll at all...but does know how to spell, or use spell check.
Fishes when not trolling the forum.
The Long Time Resident
Mentions length of residency and family history in a given place, as if it somehow lends credibility to the following 4 paragraphs of nonsensical bullshit he posts about fisheries management. Only Fishes 3 times a year, whilst reminiscing about the old days.
'Mercan through and through. Not afraid to tell you either. Has more flags and fireworks than brain cells, and is sure you're not a 'real 'mercan' just by the car you drive, or beer you drink. Didn't make the cut for 'Meal Team Six' or the 'Gravy Seals' and is still butthurt about it. Still has the tactical gear though, and the credit card payment for buying it. Has lots of guns, talks about them whenever he feels threatened. Indians ruined his fishing.
Is sure Hydroxychloroquine cures Covid, only the Rothchilds, Bill Gates and George Soros are keeping the cure away from the public, because reasons. Barely got out of High School, gets news from YouTube videos...or worse. Is on an FBI watch list, so don't answer any PM you might get from him.
Fishes with one eye looking over his shoulder.
Can accurately list all rod and reel models made since 1946, with weights of each item and relative 'swing weight' for all possible combinations therein. Has a disc drag capable of stopping a 30# salmon dead in its tracks on the reel of his 7' 3" 3 wt...and it balances perfectly. Hasn't fished since 1998.
Makes sure to offend someone with each and every post, just to keep things moving along. Too much harmony is bad for page views, and therefore ad revenue on websites. Keeps things just edgy enough on threads that page views don't decline when folks migrate to Facebook or Parler, all the while somehow not being banned either. Fishes a lot, just doesn't post about it.
Wakes up every single weekend seeing one of his misspelled, English as a Second Language, nonsensical, grammarless rants he made at 2am the previous night quoted by another poster and has no memory of making the post. I think his name is Doug... hates punctuation and grammar with a passion usually reserved for sports teams or gillnetters. Too hungover to fish.
Labors under the delusion that since his favorite river is a bit less than a 3 hour drive, he should be able to look down his nose at those who make a just over a 3 hour drive to get there as the root cause of river crowding, and degradation of his outdoor experience.
It's a Steelheading thing mostly, but also an affliction suffered by many Montanans.
Fishes only when he sees an out of state license plate at the boat launch.
Wielding powers that heretofore were only to be imagined, threads disappear in the blink of an eye and with a click of a mouse, especially if they're about Canada. Mods hate Canada...not sure why...but they do. Fishes to relieve the stress of being all powerful, after all its a heavy burden.