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Should I wear waders to a wedding ?

4K views 47 replies 22 participants last post by  Jim Wallace 
#1 ·
I am being dragged to am honored to attend a wedding near Leavenworth this Saturday. The good man goes down blessed nuptials occur at 5:30 PM. We will leave Lynnwood when the cat is fed and this and that is done bright and early so it seems like a good chance to do some fishing along the way, but we have to get home to feed the cat again return the same evening.

Consulting Moon's Washington Fishing guide, it appears that the fishing taking Highway 2 east will generally suck or be illegal, while the I-90 route would be better for my sanity and fishing in terms of speed and success scenic vistas.

Given an early start like that will ever happen and the late hour of the tragedy ceremony, after which we will leave my precious fish hit the road for hearth and home, what would be the recommendations of the maniacs wise heads gathered here for route and stops along the way?
 
#4 ·
I think you should show up and fake a phone call saying someone tried to brake into your house. Tell your wife/girlfriend or who ever is making you miss such a chance to fish, that you don't want them to miss this but you feel it would be best if one of you went back to check on the stuff in the house and feed the cat since it has to be done and you will get back as soon as you can. Now mind you when you do this it has to be kind of late. And your reason for taking so long to get back is because you wanted to make sure everything was still their so you went room by room and checked everything. And you can even use the joy of the fish you caught as how happy you are that nothing was taken.:rolleyes: I know I know no one will buy that, but its all good you will have gotten to fish by then and so what you sleep a couple nights on the couch and let be honest with how often ppl get divorced now days this will only last a few years and then he will be glad you missed it to.:p
 
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#8 ·
Your deviousness is exceeded only by your brilliance. Sadly, a high-tech finely tuned bullshit detector, refined over 40 years, would prove my downfall. It operates on wavelengths beyond any spectrum I understand. Maybe I could slam on the brakes and claim I saw somebody drowning in Keechelus, but I might save them with a 6-weight and a 5x tippet, properly played. But how do I explain the release?
 
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#10 ·
I agree,but you don't know this cat. It can't be stupid if it figured out how to be fed and housed and cleaned up after for 17 years for free. In all that time, it has never caught a mouse or fetched the paper or earned its keep in any way whatsoever. For all I know, it may know how to light matches. What if it finds my secret fishing cash and eats it? Can't take that chance.
 
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#26 ·
Isn't that what big mixing bowls were made for??? OMJ, "knows how to eat without your help..." - laughed my ass off.

My cats spend multiple days on their own when I get the chance to take a fishing trip. They know how to eat, piss and shit all by themselves. Amazing! Now, if only they'd f'ing learn to clean out their own cat box...
 
#17 ·
Good question and great answers. I too, am supposed to go to a wedding on Saturday. Though, I am going fishing in the morning. I figure a well crafted story of an over turned boat should allow me to stretch out my excursion well past the start time. The stress of such an ordeal will be far to much and an afternoon of fly tying will be the only solution.
 
#21 ·
Ok. Stash the waders in the car.....just before the wedding act like you got a text....and say "Oh, no! My good buddy Fly Punk and his buddy just over turned their boat see....uh... and....well he is really traumatized.... and uh...he really needs me to go see him, to calm him down.....yea!" That could buy you at least a few hours. Your wife/girlfriend may even give you props for being such a good friend, even though it cost you a lovely afternoon watching a beautiful union of two souls that you were SOOOOO looking forward to seeing. :) Hell, she may even make you dinner. LMAO!
 
#22 ·
Is there a wife-type or GF-type unit intimidating you to attend the accursed wedding? Are they aware of your plans to stop and fish along the way? Do they anger easily and hold a grudge with revenge a possibility?

You should keep these things in mind. A hungry cat could be the least of your problems.

I suppose you could point out there is really no reason to attend the wedding in the first place because the marriage only has a 50/50 chance of lasting and no one ever gives back their wedding gifts when they finally split the sheets so you may as well go fishing instead.
 
#23 ·
Is there a wife-type or GF-type unit intimidating you to attend the accursed wedding? Are they aware of your plans to stop and fish along the way? Do they anger easily and hold a grudge with revenge a possibility?

You should keep these things in mind. A hungry cat could be the least of your problems.

I suppose you could point out there is really no reason to attend the wedding in the first place because the marriage only has a 50/50 chance of lasting and no one ever gives back their wedding gifts when they finally split the sheets so you may as well go fishing instead.
Having re-watched "Grumpier Old Men" last week, your responsibility is to the fishing. After all, Walter Mathau was supposed to marry Sophia Loren, and he went fishing. He eventually made it to the wedding in rubber boots. I have to assume from the general flow of this thread that it is not your wedding, and if it is, it certainly isn't to Sophia. You are however, required to practice catch and release.
 
#24 ·
Play your cards very carefully here. Your goal is to teach Precious that fishing is the most wonderful lifestyle, and that she needs to embrace it herself. If that is impossible, plan B is that you convince her that fishing "grounds" you so that you can help share her/our burdens in life. If that is impossible, fuck it all, dump her now & go fish.
Plan A is best if she's outdoorsy in any way. It is good to share some passion, you know, standing up.
 
#35 ·
Hilarious post!

I use my cat for its fur...great for tying flies. Gotta keep that thing alive. I think it's more important than the wedding. I say you should tie one on and fish it hard.
The whole cat? Wouldn't that mess up my back cast? I'm using 4x tippet; I think it might snap off and land in the bushes and follow me home.
 
#39 ·
Flyfool -

I think I would like to cast a cat with 4X tippet. The snap off would be priceless!

Spey casting could be fun with one also. Imagine a cat flying through the air with a single spey water borne anchor. Just as it touched down...maybe a look of relief...until...UH OH...loaded rod explodes and off you go!

You could sell tickets to that! Fun for the whole family.
 
#40 ·
I'm starting to think that Boot got bored and created an alias on here, aka Flyfool... so well written and frickin' hilarious it's (a) giving him a run for his money, or (b) a new ingenious way of messing with our brains.

Bravo, Flyfool, if that's who you really are! :D
 
#46 ·
I'm starting to think that Boot got bored and created an alias on here, aka Flyfool... so well written and frickin' hilarious it's (a) giving him a run for his money, or (b) a new ingenious way of messing with our brains.
Jim it would never have occured to me to write about not having enough time to fish. That and I got some weird fetish issues that venn diagram badly when you combine weddings, micophones and borborygmi.
 
#42 ·
AHAHAHHAHAHA!!!!!!!!! Very nice. Sorry about the no fishing. I to was conned out of fishing Saturday. How do they do it? Sigh..... we just cant catch a break.
I think it's the bait they use. They twitch it in a certain way and we never learn from experience.
 
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